Ever had someone sitting next to you eat a delectable meal as you helplessly look on? Well, you're not helpless anymore. The art of food coercion can be learnt using these 5 simple steps:
1. Compare
Look at your own meal. Proceed to look at your friend's meal. Look them in the eye and say "Wow, your food looks amazing. Wish I could have a meal like that." Continue to eat your meal dejectedly until your friend offers a bite of his crispy chicken. Proceed to take 5 bites instead.
2. Compliment
Similar to the first C, except emphasis should be placed on flattering your friend's meal until their guilty conscience overrides their mind, and they offer you a share.
3. Complain
Repeatedly announce to your friend who is eating how bad your food is, and how this is just the icing on the cake for the horrible day you're having. If your friend doesn't have a heart of ice, you've got a tasty treat heading your way.
4. Concentrate
Stare at your friend's food longingly. Don't look away until he/she offers a bite. Repeat.
5. Calculate
Remember that time I carried your laptop from SOB to SOE? Well that slice of pizza would return that favour sufficiently.
P.s The 5Cs only works on individuals that have some semblance of a conscience and a heart. Please choose your victims wisely. Smugger on!
1. Compare
Look at your own meal. Proceed to look at your friend's meal. Look them in the eye and say "Wow, your food looks amazing. Wish I could have a meal like that." Continue to eat your meal dejectedly until your friend offers a bite of his crispy chicken. Proceed to take 5 bites instead.
2. Compliment
Similar to the first C, except emphasis should be placed on flattering your friend's meal until their guilty conscience overrides their mind, and they offer you a share.
3. Complain
Repeatedly announce to your friend who is eating how bad your food is, and how this is just the icing on the cake for the horrible day you're having. If your friend doesn't have a heart of ice, you've got a tasty treat heading your way.
4. Concentrate
Stare at your friend's food longingly. Don't look away until he/she offers a bite. Repeat.
5. Calculate
Remember that time I carried your laptop from SOB to SOE? Well that slice of pizza would return that favour sufficiently.
P.s The 5Cs only works on individuals that have some semblance of a conscience and a heart. Please choose your victims wisely. Smugger on!
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